Look, up in the sky, it's...

How can you go wrong with an event called "Balloon Fiesta"? I am going to this.


(By the way, why haven't I been to any real fireworks festivals or competitions yet? I love fireworks. And how about that Northern Lights thing? When do I get to see that?)

It's "like a little prayer" because your name is MADONNA, woman.

Madonna in concert in LA at Dodger Stadium, November 6th.

I am not ashamed: I really really really wanna go.

Buy tickets with me?

Welcome to The Oneness-Heart-Tears and Smiles International

I find the whole Sri Chinmoy thing kind of fascinating. I've read the article on him and his ultramarathon in Harper's and I've eaten at the Sri Chinmoy restaurant Jyoti Bihanga in San Diego.

But here's the question: why isn't there a Sri Chinmoy restaurant in Los Angeles? And where can I buy some of his bird drawings or other art? I really want both of these things.

But it's probably about not-wanting, isn't it?

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, neatloaf.

Let's go to the movies, Annie.

I want to see Then She Found Me because I read the book by Elinor Lipman, who I also met and loved, and because I also love Helen Hunt. But I haven't met her.

Wango?

Says You

I'd really, really like to go to this. But you know, with someone.



(For completeness, I kinda want to go to this too, also Friday night. But I won't.)

I've been empaneled! Details to come.

If you love me, if you truly love me, you'll make me this.

(No, I know you love me, don't spend 14 months of your life. Seriously.)

(Unless you really really want to.)

(Of course, my birthday is 14 months from now, incidentally.)

(No, don't. Really.)

(I wear a size large.)

I. Want. These.

It's nice that the bookcave I previously mentioned is included among these 30 creative bookshelf designs, but man, now I've entered a whole new stage of want.

Made it!

So, I have this friend who says she's had this idea forever that she'll have "made it" when she has the following three items: her own driveway, her own in-house washer and dryer, and her own KitchenAid. She now has those three things, and to tell you the truth, she does kind of feel like she's made it. Of course, she also has a husband, a house with a pool, two dogs, a business, and three children.

It got me thinking about what those magical things are that make you feel you've arrived. Do you know what yours are? It's a little hard for me to separate those particular things I believe I will someday have from those random daydreamy desires one always has... I mean, I love convertible Mustangs. Am I convinced I will one day own one? Nah. And that's ok. But you know what I want? You know when I will have arrived? When I have one of those sandwich presses, those big grills specifically for making hot-pressed panini style sandwiches. I want one of those... and a real kitchen to put it in, and a life in which I'd actually use it. (Yes, I have a George Foreman grill, yes, I can use it nearly the same way, no, please don't buy me anything. Except the Mustang, if you really want to.)

Ok, I don't *really* care about the sandwich press. I'll have made it when I have a big comfortable wonderful hammock in my backyard. I LOVE hammocks. I'll have made it when I have a rocking chair, which chair will live in the baby's room so we can sit in it when we read books before bed. Apparently I'll have arrived when I have particular things to sit on or in.

I once would have said I dreamed of having a house with a separate room for books, like a real library, instead of just shelves-in-the-office or wherever. 'Cept, I've had that once, and I don't anymore, so let's not talk about that or I might cry.

Really, let's be honest. What I want is the house, the husband, the business, the baby (though not three!), AND the chairs. I'll skip the dogs. KThanks.

"The world is perverse, but it could be worse." [0]

My friend Cotton recently (by which I mean, nearly a year ago), blogged about a non-glowing (that's an RDB-style understatement, in case you aren't yet familiar) review he was surprised to find in the first few pages of a book he was reading by Iain Banks. He asks the questions you'd ask: did someone with a conscience feel the need to warn the unsuspecting reader? Was the idea that potential readers would be so intrigued by the bad reviews that they'd be more likely to read the book? Equal time? Truth in advertising? etc.

One option that I considered that Cotton didn't mention was that it was actually an accident that those reviews were included in final printing, after maybe being in drafts as a spoof or a joke or whatever, and accidentally not having been removed.

I'm telling you this fascinating story because I just had reason to ask these questions myself. I read the fabulous Harper's Magazine and this month's issue includes an ad for the new book by Jonathan Franzen, The Discomfort Zone. Is the text in the image too small to read? The second review says, "[A] total lack of humor... perverse" and the fourth says, "Odious... incredibly annoying."

So, what's the deal? Is it a gimmick to catch my attention (it did)? Is it an inside joke style review, given the title and subject of the book? My theory of the mistaken inclusion is ruled out by the fact of this being one small clear ad, not pages of filler reviews that no one reads. Why'd they do it? Was it Franzen's idea? More importantly, have you bought me this book yet? I loved The Corrections.

[0] From the poem "Sonnet for Minimalists" by Mona Van Duyn.

I. Want. This.

Wow. A bookcave. A bookcase with a little nook for you to climb into and read. How is it that no one else thought of this before? How is that I don't have one of these? Wow.

But can my books all be blue, instead of pink? I kind of hate pink.

(By the way, I found this by way of moonrat who calls herself a "bookwench". You probably know by now that I call myself a "bookslut", so the question is, What is the difference between us? What are the philosophical and social implications of choosing one label over the other? Why does she get paid to read books and I don't? Why or why not? If so, as what?
Yeah - both her blogs are cool, so check them out if you're a bookwhore too.)

...rah!

Hey, you know that old Fandango trailer, the one from the Land Before Paper Bag Puppets, the one where the guy is trying to weasel his way into a sold-out movie with such clever lines as "I work for Mr. Fandango" and "There's a wild Fandango loose, in the theater. Rraaahh!" ? You know that one?

I want that one.

It's from 2001 or something, so it's not on youtube. What, something exists which isn't on youtube? Well, here's hoping one of you is a better googler than me or whatever, because I WANT THAT TRAILER.

And I've wanted it for a long time. Witness, if you will, the following email exchange, and note the dates on it. Impressive, no?

A query!

Date: Mon, 25 Feb 2002 14:03:12 -0500
To: marketing@fandango.com
From: <RDB's work address, back in the day>
Subject: there's a wild fandango loose... in the theater

Hello. This is a ridiculous message but...
We LOVE the fandango commercial. Is it anywhere on the web that we can download it? We LOVE it. It's ridiculous. All day long.. "rah!". Please can you post the commercial somewhere that we can get it, or send it to me, or something?
thank you.
-RDB

A reply!

Subject: RE: there's a wild fandango loose... in the theater
Date: Mon, 25 Feb 2002 15:06:21 -0800
From: "SL" <**@fandango.com>
To: RDB

Hi RDB,
My name is SL and I'm with Fandango.com. Thanks for the positive feedback. I'm glad to hear that you like our Mr. Fandango commercial. We actually get quite a few similar requests to post this commercial on our web site for our customers to view.

Unfortunately, we do not have the rights to distribute this commercial digitally. When commercials, tv shows, and films are created, many people involved in the creation of the content reserve the right to determine how the content can be distributed. In this way, actors, directors, etc. ensure that they are fairly compensated for their work and ultimately have more control of how their work is used. We were only given the rights to distribute the commercial for viewing in theaters.

Thanks again for your interest and be on the lookout for a new Fandango commercial.

....rah!
SL

You have to like this woman for replying at all, even if the message was a little condescending, but you have to LOVE her for closing with ...rah!

So: can you find it for me? You win my undying love and gratitude.

(Yes, I realize that the people who'd be willing to go through any serious effort to find this for me are the same people who already have my undying love and gratitude. So what they get is... um... Coldstone's, my treat? A comparable reward, I think.)

No, really.

w4m

My first self-description blurb:

Who I am: a big dork who thinks proofreading is fun, yippee! No, really, I'm a glamorous professional dancer. No wait, I'm an "educator" who thinks Israeli dance is a "gateway to Judaism" or some bs. No, that's not it either. Well, I'm a bookslut; that much is clear.

What I'm doing with my life: trying to get it sorted out on a new side of the country. Dancing and reading; being a dance teacher and a librarian. Trying to learn Hebrew. Looking for love. Looking for me. Looking for a cynical, sarcastic, smart guy who knows the difference between "your" and "you're" but still, deep down, has hope for the world. Ok, has hope for his own personal happily-ever-after.

My second attempt:

I currently love: dance movies and kickboxing; sushi, peanut butter, and ice cream. Being sore from working out, being sore from making out (?). Good puns, bad puns, language jokes, geeky jokes. Reading, Running, Harvard Square, NPR. Israel, Hebrew, Israeli dance. Robert Downey Jr., wandering around a new city, road trips, having a foul mouth, summer, going barefoot. Kisses on my neck, frisbee in the park. Conversations that end up requiring diagrams on napkins. Making a mess, enjoying the mess. Camus, Dostoevsky, John Irving, John Steinbeck. Nick Hornby, Tom Robbins. Eating. My friends, my family, my family-friends. Well-defined shoulder muscles. Christopher Guest movies, but "For Your Consideration" sucked. Wonder Woman. Helicopters. Moxy Fruvous, McSweeneys, Tom Stoppard. xkcd. I'm hoping to love forever: a tall, smart, sarcastic, honest boy who loves many (some? a few?) of those things as well.

Which do you like better? Which is more likely to nab me the Boy of My Dreams (TM) ? Are YOU the BoMD? Do you know him? Can you send him my way, pretty please?